Chuunin Examiners Supremeo!: Thanksgiving
by Hyper Riceball
Summary: (real title wouldn't fit ) Anko, Ibiki, Gemma, and Hayate are going to make THE best Thanksgiving ever! But their adventures in doing so may cause them quite a lot of...problems. R&R peez!


DISCLAIMER: Not mine.

Author's Note: This story is only for those people who actually remember the Chuunin Examiners' names and who they are, meaning cool smart actual Naruto fans who wave little flags that say "HAYATE IS OUR GOD".

Title: Chuunin Examiners Supreme-o!: The Best Thanksgiving Ever

Rating: PG-13 so far

Author: Hyper Riceball

Reason: Utter boredom and lack of recent fic.

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!!!!

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"This is going to be the best Thanksgiving ever!" Mitarashi Anko smiled happily as she bustled about Konoha, buying things from random stores that she thought would be a nice asset to her perfect meal. "I'm going to invite everyone in Konoha to my feast, and they'll put my name in lights for being the best Thanksgiving chef they'll ever have!"

But then she realized something. She couldn't do this alone! She was so useless, pointless, and appear-in-only-a-few-episodes-ish that she needed the help of other ninjas in the village to pull this together!

Millions of rabid Kakashi fangirls screamed their favorite little Jounin's name in unison, but Anko ignored them. "YOU PEOPLE SUCK!" she yelled. "KAKASHI IS TOO OVERUSED AND EVERYBODY LOVES HIM TOO MUCH, SO I'M NOT GOING TO HAVE HIM APPEAR IN THIS FIC! EVER!"

People now wanted to kill Anko. Oh how they wanted to kill her. They threatened to stab her to death. With knives, cleavers, swords, babies, anything.

"Hmph," she hmphed. "Just to bug you damned Kakashi fangirls, I'm going to only have useless, pointless, appear-in-only-a-few-episodes-ish people help me make this grand feast!" And with that decision, she zoomed off down the road to find all the other Chuunin Examiners. We all know they're useless, pointless, appear-in-only-a-few-episodes-ish people!

"I FOUND YOU, GEMMA!" Anko screeched as she jumptackled Shiranui Gemma, who was busy giving himself a spongebath in the middle of the street.

Gemma looked up at Anko and raised an eyebrow like WTF WHO ARE YOU OH YEAH YOU'RE THAT ANKO LADY HUH YEAH OKAY but not really. Gemma doesn't talk in capitals. "......"

"Gemma, I need you to--what the hell are you doing?" Anko blinked at the naked-plus-toothpick Gemma who was spongebathing himself.

"Spongebathing myself. Are you blind or something?" he replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"But. . .why?"

"Because. I'm sexy and the world needs to know. I wasn't around long enough in the series for people to fall head-over-heels for me like they did Sasuke."

"So, you're spongebathing yourself in the middle of the road?"

"Yeah."

"Oh. Makes sense." Anko shrugged and walked away. Then she scampered back, remembering her purpose. "I need you to help me make a Thanksgiving dinner for the entire village."

Gemma raised and lowered his eyebrows suggestively at passing pedestrians, making growly-purry noises just for effect, but people didn't think he was sexy; they thought he was scary, especially when he did these things to a little baby in a stroller. Silly paedophilic Gemma.

"So. . .will you?"

Gemma turned back to Anko. "Fine. But only if you return the favor later, when I ask you to."

Not knowing what he wanted and not really caring, Anko quickly agreed. Well, look, she had it! The first member of her posse! The posse that she was to concoct the most delicious supper in Konoha with! THE THANKSGIVING POSSE! Anko was so excited she imploded. But not really. We can't kill off our main character THIS early, can we? Naah. Implosion IS a good thing though, I may use it later if I find appropriate.

Gemma has some talent, being able to give his own body a spongebath. And he knows it. He knows that he's got talents like no other, which is why he decided to join Anko on her Thanksgiving task. Thanksgiving is PURE talent. You need turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, etc. and it takes sheer talent to collect those things. Especially the stuffing. Stuffing is a VICIOUS beast and Gemma knows it.

"So, now we need to get more members of our awesome Thanksgiving Posse," Anko said. "Who should we get now?"

Gemma went into deep thought mode. He shifted his eyes to the side, and tapped his chin softly with his finger, and made a "hmmm" noise, and chewed lightly on his toothpick, and rubbed his tummy, and pat his head, and ate little baby giraffe carcasses and pooped on Hawaiian albinos and DEVOURED THEIR SPLEENS AND SUCKED OUT THEIR BODILY FLUIDS AND SPREAD AN EPIDEMIC OF KAWASAKI'S DISEASE THROUGHOUT THE LAND VIA HIS FLARED NOSTRILS AND---yeah. Let's just say he was thinking.

"How about Ibiki?" he finally concluded. "Ibiki is a very friendly individual. I'm sure he'd help."

Meanwhile, our very friendly individual Morino Ibiki was doin' his job: severely torturing passerby Sound nin with a pair of chopsticks in his underground dungeon. We love our very friendly individual Ibiki.

"Yes, that's an excellent idea, Gemma!" Anko squealed with delight.

So, Anko and Gemma went off to find Ibiki. Gemma insisted he finish his spongebath first, so it took a few more hours before they actually did go off to find Ibiki, but oh well. Eventually they found him at a pizza restaurant chowing down on some pepperoneh goodness.

"Hey Ibiki! There you are! We've been looking all over for you, you silly bastard," Anko said.

"It's 'cause ah'm black, huh? Huh? What's that, honky? You wanna take this outside? What's wrong witchoo?" Ibiki growled.

"But Ibiki. . .you're not black. o.o" Anko stated, wondering what had gone wrong with her fellow Examiner. But then again, Gemma was acting strangely too. She finally concluded that everyone must be on pot or something.

"You're right. No matter how much I wish it, I'm not black. Now then, why are you here?" he asked, getting back into his IC Ibikiness.

"Gemma and I are making a big Thankgiving feast for all of Konoha! Would you like to help us?" Anko smiled sweetly.

"Fo shizzle!"

Anko and Gemma just kinda blinked.

". . .sorry."

"I take it you're in then. C'mon, Ibiki! Welcome to the group!" Anko laughed happily, and she ran towards Ibiki in a hug-me pose, wanting to make this new addition to the Thanksgiving Posse as Ash-Catches-A-Pokemon-esque as possible. It didn't work though, what with Ibiki moving out of the way just in time. Aww how sad.

"I think this is enough people for now," Gemma said. "Let's head to your place, Anko, so we can get started on the cooking." 

Everyone agreed and they all ran on over to Anko's and gathered around a counter in the kitchen. The order from left to right is Ibiki-Anko-Gemma just so you know. YOU NEED TO KNOW FOR SOME REASON SO SHUT UP.

"Can we have some Uchiha-bacon with our meal?" Gemma asked. "I really like how when Itachi killed the clan, he turned them into bacon and sold it to the public. Mama Uchiha is so tangy!"

Anko shrugged. "Naah. Uchiha-bacon is a breakfast food. Besides, I'm having the whole of Konoha over to eat this feast, and we don't want Sasuke to freak out or anything."

Gemma and Ibiki nodded, understanding her reasoning. Uchiha-bacon WAS tasty though.

"Okay, first, we'll need the stuffing."

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The stuffing?! THE STUFFING?! OH NO! What exciting adventures befall our unlikely heroes next time, on. . .CHUUNIN EXAMINERS SUPREME-O!!!!

. . .tomorrow's the real Thanksgiving everyone. Of course, by the time I completely finish this fic, it'll probably be July. XD

Did you like it? I know, it's really random and stupid, but hey, congratulate me on my first fic in like a YEAR! I've been having serious writer's block.

Next chapter title: . . .well I dunno yet. But it'll have to do with stuffing, I'm sure. And I'll probably add Hayate to the posse since he seems left out.

Give me nice reviews and I'll keep writing. . 


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